Matthew 10:33

"But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven."

My heart just breaks for my daughter and her two little girls.

I called and talked to the girls today. TJei mentioned she had gone to church with a friend, Amy, and just loved going to her church. I asked if Amy is LDS, she is not, she is Jehovah Witness. My heart just sank but quite honestly, I was glad she had gone to church.

I talked with Mia and she told me about the roller coaster she was building with her Daddy, David. As we talked, I could hear TJei in the background saying she wanted to tell me something so I asked to talk to her again when Mia and I finished talking.

TJei proceeded to tell me that her mom said, "she (mom) is an atheist and that me and Mia are Jehovah Witness now."

I was stunned, still am. I'm not sure if it will ever make sense to me that Jodie would do that to herself and the girls. I asked TJei if she knew what being an atheist means. She didn't. I told her atheists do not believe in God, they believe God does not exist. I asked her if she believed in God, she said yes, God is real.

There is hope.

They are in my prayers. All of them. I love them so very much and my heart is so heavy for the challenges and trials come up for them. The challenges that are part of life and the challenges created by Jodie lashing out at me and others.

Best Friend

There honestly could not be anything sweeter than this message sent to me yesterday. It not only made my day, it gave me cause to reflect on time spent with my grandchildren.

 

 

I started typing this out early this morning, before going to Stake Conference. I didn't get very far on it before the hustle and bustle of the day started filling my minutes and hours. The post, and sentiment of the post, has still occupied my thoughts back in the corners of my mind.

 

Each of my grandchildren are such very special little people. They are each strong and confident and each has their own set of skills, talents, and interests. Each of them are so very creative, inspirational, and kind.

 

It just melts my heart to know, or even believe that any of my dear grandchildren would consider me their friend...their best friend is beyond measure.

 

Yes, Papa and I went to Holbrook last evening and visited the Roxy Theater with the little ones, and their dad. We had a delightful time...popcorn, candy, new teeth (Daphne), sitting by Papa (Bridges), sitting by Grandma (Davis) and Charlie Brown. What a fun evening it was. I'm so glad these little ones like us enough to invite us to the movies with them. :)

 

 

Interesting Turn

It's really sad when your only daughter....my only daughter posts an 'oh yeah' message to Facebook to let me know she got married five days earlier.

I wondered aloud, she couldn't tell me ahead of time or at the time?

She couldn't tell me during any of the dozen communications we've had in the past week talking about the timeshare and how she wanted to use it for a special family get-away?

She couldn't tell me during any of the dozen or so communications we've had about the girls going camping with us?

She couldn't have done it during any of the dozens of other text messages and communications this past week?

She couldn't do it when we were just within five feet of one another, when we were at her house but she couldn't even acknowledge us being there and couldn't even do a face to face conversation? She stayed across the garage from us or in the living room with us outdoors during the entire time we were there to pick up the girls. She couldn't shout it out to us then. She had to wait until after we left then post it on Facebook like this.

It must have been extra special for her, and him too. Surrounded by all those who mean anything to them.

 

 

I really was saddened that she chose this route to tell us but not near as saddened as I was to realize her two beautiful daughters were just learning about this, too, as I read her post to their grandpa as we drove along the road. It seems I'm not the only one she goes out of her way to alienate and hurt.

It is an interesting turn of events. On the way to the Valley, which we hadn't at all planned to do, I had commented on how inconsiderate she is to us. Always. Regularly. We were supposed to meet in Flagstaff the day before so the girls could come with us to go camping. That didn't work out. It was rescheduled for 10:00 the next morning. That'd didn't work, it was rescheduled for 2:00 in the afternoon. Then a few minutes out from Flagstaff, we learn she isn't headed out yet, Jacob will be in about 2:00 and then they'll come up. That would have put us twiddling our thumbs and waiting until at least 5:00pm for them to arrive in Flag. All the while, it is just expected all of this is okay with us. And, in reality, it probably has been okay with us, else the girls suffer the consequence along with us. 

As it is. Mike will not get to spend any time camping this weekend. We were supposed to go up on the mountain Friday and he would have had the weekend up there. He has to work Monday and all week so the weekend was all he had available. We got back from the Valley after dark last night, too late for taking the trailer up to the mountains. So, he'll take the trailer up and set it up for us today but he'll have to come back home tonight for work tomorrow.

We honestly are reaching our breaking point though. As we get older and closer to retirement, we realize we don't need this constant stress in our lives. We have grown aware of our ability to disconnect from the chaos and find ways to relax and enjoy our time together and even alone individually. We have learned that we can spend time with other family members and enjoy ourselves immensely without the stress. We can spend time with friends and enjoy the experiences without worry. 

This morning, it occurred to me that maybe Mia should have our house some day in the future. When she woke this morning, with a huge smile, she said she loved this house, she loved being here and, this is where she has the best dreams. She then proceeded to tell me how she dreamed she was outside playing with Sarah and Maren and I took brownies out for them. Oh, how I love this girl!   . 

Quiet Reflections

My heart has been tender the past couple days since running into a long time acquaintance and visiting with her for a time. Maybe it is all touching on my heart even more with so many of the Conference talks including messages about life and death - overcoming the heartache of losing someone special. Jan's husband passed away this summer while we were traveling. I knew her husband Mike, I had worked with him at the power plant. I had offered condolences to Jan, she shared with us (Mike and I) memories of her husband and the struggles he endured over those last few months.

Far too many of the struggles Jan shared caused me to reflect back on the struggles my own husband went through a few years ago. The challenges and trials, the illness and weakness, the fight he undertook to remain here in this life still amazes me. Over those months, watching the challenges he overcame, there was never a doubt in my mind I was seeing miracles at every turn.

Mike and I had just returned from the Valley on Thursday, late night. Probably later than we should have but we made it home safely. We had been in the Valley so he could visit with his cardiologist, his semi-annual check-up and all is well. It was so refreshing to have such a brief visit...no problems or concerns to report, no unidentified pains or difficulties. The office visit was brief, we were feeling pretty good when we left the office and went about the other things we wanted to do before heading out to return home.

Bridges had been with us during our stay in the Valley. What a fun little boy he is! At some time or another, Papa had called him Tex and he now loves when Papa calls him by that name. :) After another recent visit to the Valley, I had brochures for travel trailers when I stayed with the kids. Bridges had poured over those brochures, specifically the floor plans so we had invited Bridges to go to the Valley with us because we would be getting a new trailer. He was delighted! We sure enjoyed spending time with him one on one.

I am so grateful for the quiet moments, the messages, our friends, his doctors, our family and time together. I am especially grateful for having the fullness of the gospel available at this time and for the love and sacrifices of my Savior, Jesus Christ.

Balloons and Stents

Mike visited his cardiologist last week as part of his routine exams. She wanted him to get an angiogram done as follow-up to his exam since it has been 3 years since he had one completed. Mike checked into the heart hospital yesterday, while I was still in California with Quentin and family. When we got into Phoenix we came here to the hospital. Mike was already in getting the angiogram procedure, John was in the waiting area. Dr. Strumph came out and described what the exam had revealed, Mike had blockage occurring in the same area he'd had blockages 3 years ago. He wanted to consult with Dr. Sachs, cardiologist, before committing to a treatment plan so Mike had to stay the night in the hospital. I stayed with him, our youngsters returned to their homes...after a really nice dinner out together (John's treat) :)  We had dinner at the Angry Crab and really enjoyed the food and company.

After waiting all day for word on what would be happening, we finally learned Mike would go in about 4:15 to have a stent placed in the problematic area. He went in about 5pm and I started the wait again to hear how things went. The front offices closed, lights dimmed in the foyer and still the pager laying on the seat next to me remained quiet. With no one in the front areas to answer questions, I went around to the phone outside recovery and asked if they could check on my husband's status. Ack! He was in recovery! I went back and visited with him.

The nurse was especially nice. She contacted the doctor so he could give me an update on how things had gone (smoothly, no problems).  I was advised Mike would stay the night in recovery because ICU was full. There is no room for me to stay in recovery, it is tight quarters in there. I went back up to Mike's room and gathered my stuff since he wouldn't be returning there after all. Now, I am waiting, and will spend the night in the waiting area at the main foyer of the hospital. Yuck. Uncomfortable but doable to be nearby.

Dr. Strumph had tried using a balloon technique to open the closed off area but that didn't work well so he positioned a stent in ace to keep the vessel open.

Fun Travel - Ireland

We've been traveling along again, this time to Ireland and having a wonderful time. We have made flags, rainbow placemats, and leprechaun telescopes. We read O'Sullivan Stew, Tim O'Toole and the Wee Folk, and Jamie O'Rourke and the Big Potato.

 

 

Davis did a little jig for us. The boy has some moves and isn't embarrassed to show them. He s so fun and fun-loving!

 



 

 

We made rainbow waffles for dinner one evening. Daphne loved being the little kitchen helper and wearing her apron to help with dinner. Bridges was super excited about the plate of goodness he was getting ready to bite into. :)



 

 

Lucy gets into the fun and creativity, too. I love having time with these little ones and just love, love, love that we have so much fun together.  

 



 

 

Mike and I enjoyed stuffed pepper soup...this was the start of it, not the finished soup. It was really good. We'll probably have it again. It's sure easier than stuffing and baking the peppers. :)

 



 

 

Dessert for Mike and I. Well, actually, just Mike. I think the red and yellow think prevented me from indulging. A neighbor sent over the treat as a thank you for doing a talk on baptism at her daughter's baptism  earlier that day. Yum. Mike enjoyed the treat over the next couple days. 

 



 

 

Okay, this one just melted my heart! I got this picture on my phone early in the morning St. Paddy's Day. He thought I was bringing a shirt for him so he wouldn't get pinched! Poor fellow, Grandma was just bringing a green paper wrist band for him.

 

 

 

Okay, no judging! Let's be perfectly clear...Grandma is not going to say no when a little offers to rub her feet!

 



 

 

 

I sure hope this video works. This little guy is awesome. In case you don't know the 3rd Article of Faith, follow along as he recites it from memory (seriously, he's only 3 years old).

3. We believe that through the Atonement of Christ, all mankind may be saved, by obedience to the laws and ordinances of the Gospel.



For dinner St. Paddy's Day we had corned beef and cabbage. Poppa had dinner with us in Holbrook. We had rainbow fruit cups for dessert and the youngsters enjoyed their "make believe" flight to Ireland where they "saw" hedgehogs, Irish setters, lambs, and leprechauns!

Fun Travel - Australia

The past few weeks have been so much fun as Jacob and Maria's little one have learned about Australia's culture, food, animals, and geography.

There But For the Grace of God, Go I

I am an unusual character, no doubt about it. Unique, that's how I prefer to identify myself but I am enough of a realist to know many others would use other descriptive expressions. Some nice, others maybe not so nice. I hope the majority in the end would choose something nice.

Life is good. It isn't easy at times but it is good. I try hard to always look for the good. A short while ago, a long-time friend invited me to her special Facebook page. It is a page documenting her trials and tribulation, fears and strengths, and her tremendous courage as she faces yet another battle against ovarian cancer. Sheree has always been such a kind and confident woman with a smile that would brighten your entire day. It is still there, her smile, her sparkling eyes, her enthusiasm for life, and her testimony. Sheree has a testimony that has not been shaken by the challenges she faces. She shared a message about Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin's conference message, "Come What May, and Love It" and how it has changed her outlook. She has changed my outlook. My struggles seem so small in comparison to her trials. I love this special lady and my heart goes out to her and those close to her. I pray for her continued ability to face these hardships and conquer this horrible disease.

Earlier I watched a television show and at the end of the show I was overcome with emotion. Emotion and thoughts that events in my life could have gone as sadly as they'd gone for the character in that show...a mom, scared and isolated. Someone asked me recently what my thoughts and feelings were about religions prior to becoming a member of the church. I had related that I don't really recall what my total thoughts and feelings had been but I did know that I have always had the sense that I do not walk this life alone. I believe I've always had a sense of being guided, being led...although I made plenty of mistakes along the way. My life, too, like the character in the show, could have been so totally different if I didn't have that internal hope of something different, a better path for my life.

"In moments of fear or doubt or troubling times, hold to the ground you have already won, even if that ground is limited. . . When these moments come and issues surface, the resolution of which is not immediately forthcoming, hold fast to what you already know and stand strong until additional knowledge comes."
—Jeffrey R. Holland

I am grateful for the love our Heavenly Father has extended to me, the grace that has been gifted to me by way of the Atonement in forgiving the mistakes along my journey. I am grateful for the redeeming love and sacrifice of our savior, Jesus Christ. I know all things are made possible through Him