Adversity

A quote caught my eye recently, again. I have seen and heard this little message time and again but for some reason it touched my heart in a special way recently.

"It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself, that determines how your life's story will develop." ~Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Maybe it is because my heart has been softened for victims of the heartless shootings at a movie theater in Colorado. So much pain and hurt. So much grief. They probably won't ever have answers to their questions, they'll never learn why. They must pick up their shattered lives and move on beyond this heartache though. It is what's needed. It is what's expected.

Somehow, we...as a nation, as a society, expect others to have their time for pain and grief but then move on, not remain a victim. Rise above whatever challenge has been faced. Overcome and achieve.

Perhaps that is how I feel, too. Perhaps that is how I have been able to move on, go beyond adversity. Let go of the pain and grief.

Many, many times I have thought about writing of my life experiences. Many, many times I've tabled the notion. Too many people, people who don't know me well, people who know me very well, and people who are nearest and dearest to me would have a tough time with some of the things I would write. If I were writing a life story. At least one of my children has asked me to do that on several occasions. He feels separated, isolated somehow from my life...beyond the days of being his mom. He has inquired about childhood, "I know nothing about your life as a child."

Is it enough to simply say, "Things were tough"?

I don't know.

One thing I do know, my reaction to adversity has brought forth a world of change in my life, in living. I have learned to express gratitude and appreciation more freely, to people and especially to my Heavenly Father. I have learned to carry a prayer in my heart, at all times, in all places. To pray for help and guidance, to pray in thanks and joy. I have learned over the years - not an easy one - that I am special, I have purpose and being, that I am also "not so special" ...that I am so very much like so many others.

I am happy today with the person I am. I love my life. I love my husband and children. My grandchildren mean the world to me. They each hold a precious piece of my life and heart. Adversity has played an integral part of the person I have become. I am me. Complete...but not perfect.